September 2, 2006
Beth: I’m not mentally prepared for this.
Lauren: Are we sure we want to go?
Blackberry
Beth: Where’s my blackberry?
(90 seconds after FedExing it back to Fenton)
==
The LA Experience
Girl in Target: Sunglasses shopping is like harder than jeans shopping and lingerie shopping, combined.
==
Time to Change Banks
Washington Mutual Customer Service Agent: Well, a checking account is for spending money and a savings account is for saving money.
==
Christmas Mass?
Kerry: I think we already did our duty. We went to a Jesus store. And I live by a church, so I have holiness wafting in my window.
==
Too Many Mai-Tais
Mrs. Barker: What’s a name for a rodent with three letters that starts with an ‘r’?
Lauren: Mouse?
==
I’m Rich, B****!
Timeshare Sales Guy: Have you ever stayed in a Holiday Inn?
Beth: Sure.
Sales Guy: Would you stay there for a week?
Beth: Uh… no…
Sales Guy: Good, cause if you said yes, we wouldn’t have anything more to talk about.
==
Otherwise Known as Granchildren
Timeshare Sales Guy: This is not for your children. It’s for your children’s children.
==
Back in America
Entertainment Tonight host: Why do you think people are obsessed with [Britney Spears]?
Expert: Because people are.
==
Together Again
Lauren: Oh, I was looking around for your blackberry.
==
He was talking about the accent
[Name withheld]: There’s a fine line between being Southern and being retarded.
==
Now I know I’m Home
SC Newspaper Front-Page Headline: Hog Hunter Shoots Self, Misses Hog

