You Can’t Handle the Truth
Timeshare Guy: Is it that you don’t trust me?
Beth: No… well, yes.
==
Exciting Times South of the Border
Beth: There’s a mall! There’s an Office Depot! There’s an entire truck of Corona!
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Glitzless
Lauren: What are we going to do tomorrow in this town?
Beth: Find an internet café and spend the whole day in it.
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Glitz
Lauren: Oh, Christmas tree lights! Christmas tree lights make everything better.
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Deep Thoughts
Lauren: How did rednecks get their names? I mean, can’t they just put on sunscreen?
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A Porch and A Fridge
Lauren: Now THIS, this… This is a vacation. Everything up until this point is not.
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Rentals
Beth: Let’s just enjoy the day and worry about the budget tomorrow.
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More Shining American Moments
CNN Reporter: Robbie Williams LIVE in Mexican City!
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Lost in Translation
Sign: Please don’t get inside the restaurant if you are wet.
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Gardening Tools?
Beth: I will be so glad when I never see another machete.
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I Feel Pretty, Oh So Pretty, I feel Pretty and Witty and…
Lauren: God, gay people are so… GAY.
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Bloggernator
Beth: Oh my gosh. Susie McIntosh is a machine!
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Touch of Home
Lauren: It’s a sad thing when Big Box stores bring tears to your eyes.
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Do We Really Want to Go Home?
Beth: Let’s just take my student loan money and run…
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What?
Beth: I feel like my eye needs to fart.
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The Lyrical Genius of Techno
Techno Song: Be my bad boy, be my man, be my weekend lover, but don’t be my friend
**
Techno Song: You cheated on me from behind.
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Gee, Which Half?
Beth: I really don’t understand half of this species.
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No Mirrors
Lauren: I still have some fat…
Beth: Well, you’re on your period right now. You should just not look at yourself for the next week.
==
Beth’s Stomach + 16 Hour Bus Ride
Taxi Driver: 16 hours, and 16 plastic bags. A kilo of plastic bags!
==
What Would The Pope Say?
Kat (Miami Ink): I love Catholic art. A lot of Catholic art is perfect for tattooing.
==
Dire Need of Victoria’s Secret
Beth: I can feel my underwear dangling between my legs.
==
$1 Margaritas
1pm
Beth: Why is it that Americans know how to do Mexico best?
**
3pm
Beth: It’s 3:00 and I’m buzzed. This is how life should be.
**
7pm
Beth: How did we get drunk and hung-over in the same day?
==
Accent Reduction for the Governator
Beth: I mean, we can imitate him. He should be able to imitate himself.
==
She Works Hard for the Diamonds
Paula (Mexican Jeweler): I see Asian women come in with American men and they get anything they want. What do they do?
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Thanks, Mom
Mrs. B: You know, ice cubes are made from water!
==
Ever, Ever
This is the second to last hotel that we will ever check into!
==
27 Hours Later
Beth: I think I’ve gained weight sitting on this bus.
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More Shining American Moments
Pretty Ricky (One-hit wonder: Age Is Just a Number): I didn’t mean to kill him, but, you know… Sometimes things don’t go according to plan.
==
Keep On Keeping On
Lauren: When you’ve been around the world, what is there left to do in life?
Beth: See more of it.
==
Let Freedom Waft
Beth: I feel more free here. You can feel that freedom is wafting over the border.
==
Let Freedom Smell
Lauren: Doesn’t it smell like the US?
Beth: It smells like a sewer.
==
GirlsGoneHome.com
Lauren: What do we do with blogging when we get home?
Beth: I suppose we have to end it sometime.
==
Drinkable Tolerance
Lauren: You really need to drink in these environments or they’re unbearable.
Beth: The more I drink, the lower the volume gets.
==
Well, Let’s See…
Lauren: What other games are there other than Chess and Scrabble?
==
Home Is Where the Calm Is
Lauren: I think once I’m not panicked that our stuff is getting stolen every two seconds my adrenaline level will return to normal.
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Empty Your Pockets
Lauren: I can’t believe that people get trashed and go to the border.
Beth: I know. The last thing I would want to deal with when I’m drunk is a homeland security official.
==
Lost In Translation
Hotel Room Notice: No Pest In Room
**
Hotel Room Notice: When registering itself, the client between the period of 0:00 hours and 6:00 at night took like previous part.
==
As Good as G-Rated Gets in TJ
Restaurant Doorman: Come on in! Nice family place – 2 for 1 margaritas!
==
MEXICO CHEERS:
To Mexico/To The Fridge/To Corona/To Finally Finding $1 Beers in Mexico/To $1 Margaritas/To Timeshares/To Mrs. B/To Uncle Ross/To making it out of Tijuana alive/To 4 beers and 2 shots of Tequila for $7/To Katie/To being bitches in NY
